So, I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that most of those in my blog readership do not have an extensive knowledge in Zambian culture. That’s not entirely shocking because there are pretty much only two things this country is famous for: (1) a woman boxer named Esther Phiri who is the champion of the world and (2) these ginormous waterfalls on the Zambia/Zimbabwe border called Victoria Falls. I think it might be one of the 7 natural wonders of the world and it's pretty much a requirement that you visit them prior to leaving the country.
While I plan on doing whatever is humanly possible to watch one of Phiri’s future title fights next time she is in Lusaka, the sad truth is that I do not have any awesome women’s boxing stories. I did, however, (finally) make my way to Livingstone about a month ago and I’m ready to tell stories.
I’m pretty sure I’ve documented in the past how much I love the negation process here in Zambia. It shouldn’t come as any surprise then that my absolute favorite part of the trip was the street vendors. In Lusaka, there are Sunday markets where you can buy arts and crafts and other tourist crud. They have essentially the same items in Livingstone, but the vendors just crack me up. All of them are wearing some American-themed t-shirt (like the Yankees or the Cubs) and always say one of three things: "Where are you from?", "Please, Zambian handshake my friend -- (side note: the country actually has a national 3-part handshake)", or "Looking is free". My personal favorite vendor was this dood with a pimped out Dodgers hat. I went into his little stand to look around (I've seen all of the stuff in Lusaka), but got excited when I saw a slingshot made of rubber bands. I asked him how much and he asked me if I was paying in dollars or kwacha. I love it when things are priced in dollars; they might as well post a sign that says 'I knoe you are a tourist and I definitely plan on ripping you off.' He tells me it costs 45,000 kwacha ($15 U.S. and a complete lie) but he'll sell it to me for the local price (also a lie) of 35,000 kwacha. I lowball with 10,000 (about $3). He breaks quickly and lowers to 30,000 and then 20,000 without me saying a word, and finally 'Okay, 10 pin.' I'm momentarily stunned at how quickly he buckled and giddily take the money out. I had no intention of buying it and have zero need for it, but it's a SLINGSHOT MADE OUT OF RUBBER BANDS!!! Absolute highlight of the trip.
While I plan on doing whatever is humanly possible to watch one of Phiri’s future title fights next time she is in Lusaka, the sad truth is that I do not have any awesome women’s boxing stories. I did, however, (finally) make my way to Livingstone about a month ago and I’m ready to tell stories.
I’m pretty sure I’ve documented in the past how much I love the negation process here in Zambia. It shouldn’t come as any surprise then that my absolute favorite part of the trip was the street vendors. In Lusaka, there are Sunday markets where you can buy arts and crafts and other tourist crud. They have essentially the same items in Livingstone, but the vendors just crack me up. All of them are wearing some American-themed t-shirt (like the Yankees or the Cubs) and always say one of three things: "Where are you from?", "Please, Zambian handshake my friend -- (side note: the country actually has a national 3-part handshake)", or "Looking is free". My personal favorite vendor was this dood with a pimped out Dodgers hat. I went into his little stand to look around (I've seen all of the stuff in Lusaka), but got excited when I saw a slingshot made of rubber bands. I asked him how much and he asked me if I was paying in dollars or kwacha. I love it when things are priced in dollars; they might as well post a sign that says 'I knoe you are a tourist and I definitely plan on ripping you off.' He tells me it costs 45,000 kwacha ($15 U.S. and a complete lie) but he'll sell it to me for the local price (also a lie) of 35,000 kwacha. I lowball with 10,000 (about $3). He breaks quickly and lowers to 30,000 and then 20,000 without me saying a word, and finally 'Okay, 10 pin.' I'm momentarily stunned at how quickly he buckled and giddily take the money out. I had no intention of buying it and have zero need for it, but it's a SLINGSHOT MADE OUT OF RUBBER BANDS!!! Absolute highlight of the trip.
Other noteworthy parts of the trip
-- So, my friends came up with the absolutely fantastic (note: sarcasm) idea to take a 6-7 hour bus for $50 roundtrip rather than the $225 flight. The adventure started at the Lusaka bus station on a Friday morning at 6:00 a.m. Let me just say that it was absolutely remarkable how many people were at the station that early and how eager how many of them were to help out the 3 white people.
-- They played Nigerian movies on the bus the ENTIRE way. They were in English, but that didn’t make them any less awful.
-- We went to dinner one night at this over-the-top 'African Restaurant'. They serve traditional cuisine and have a tribal dance performance after everyone has eaten. Shockingly, I got pulled up on stage to dance (I woulda bet any money in the world that would have happened). I think the girl who dragged me up there was sufficiently embarrassed and regretting her decision by the end. It's a total tourist trap, but it was actually a lot of fun.
-- What about the waterfalls? Pretty amazing. The two things that truly impressed me were the power (i.e. the noise and the distance they sent the water) and the length they stretched. We were able to walk across from them (about a quarter of a mile away) and we were getting drenched by the water -- it was like it was raining.
In conclusion, Tribal dancing, Nigerian movies, and rubberband slingshots. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Zambians. (Boooooo only one person who will understand the BMW reference.)
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